On one of those rare nights in early September, when the humidity is coasting at below 30%, it follows that every Manhattan sidewalk cafe is going to be packed to full capacity . It’s that way at 60% humidity too.  

On such days you can count on every square inch of green in downtown Manhattan being rabidly claimed by people who, if pushed, are ready to defend their spots with gang-style grit. Yet, these are the very same people who sit there, sipping cocktails, cocking their heads in coversation, seeming as though they lacked any care in the world. At least that’s what it often seems like to those who with iron determination, wearing every expression from defiant resolve, to near-faint fatigue and near-death resignation babysit those coveted seats unrelentingly (or so I’m told, anyway ). 

Last Wednesday, in a bout of fluke-like fortune, a fellow native New Yorker friend and I were among those who had the seeming privilege of occupying one of those seats at Madison Square Park. We basked at our being on the lucky side of the coveted object and feeling mildly self-congratulatory about the fact that our eagle eye vision and quick reaction time in this doggy-dog, hard-strapped or space town of ours had served us well. Having secured a table at Madison Square Park after 6 on a weeknight by no means signified that our need to strategize had come to an end. 

Quite the contrary, the queue for ordering food at the park’s jumping roadside food joint,  Shake Shack was about 60 hungry after-workers strong and not moving. Add to that the fact that the ordering would need to be done in shifts since someone would have to stay behind to guard the table. Our growling stomachs, as if compensating for our ”we’ll put up with just about anything for affordable eats in an urban oasis-like setting” attitudes, commanded that we take our quest for a decent outdoor meal downtown.

The obvious move was to head toward Union Square. Even though we knew that our favorites on that stretch from the Flatiron District to Union Square Park: Coffee Shop (we were willing to overlook the attitude), Republic and Heartland Brewery would require half hour waits, we decided to give it a shot anyway since we were there and we were thinking with our stomachs instead of our minds, anyway. Of course, our expectations were confirmed.

Banking on density, we took our quest to the aorta of NYU-ville: University Place. About two blocks into it my friend spots an empty table at the Jack Bistro’s sidewalk cafe. We made a bee line and our starving asses were warmly greeted by a sweet hostess who seated us immediately. Within seconds our waiter came with the menus. We put in our cocktail orders before even attempting to examine the menus. A $9.95 blood orange cosmopolitan for me and an Absolut dirty martini for him. The cocktails were small, but mine was mixed right and hit the spot.

We ordered burgers. Starting at $16.95,  they seemed over-priced in relation to the other items on the menu. But we were hungry for red meat and the platter arrangment of mesclun and herb fries made the burgers sound that much more mouth-watering.

What arrived on the small oval platters that our friendly waiter served us were thin burgers with wilted mesculun. When we requested that our mesclun be replaced with fresh greens, our waiter was professional and responsive. The meat was tasty and cooked to our request and the fries crisp and seasoned just right. All in all, the platter was not worth $18.00 (after cheese) and the entire meal, a bit of a rip-off at $40 a head, even despite the good service and view of the charming 12th St. townhouses we got from our table.  Hmmm, could that have had anything to do with our zero wait for the table? I wonder

For a real satisfying burger experience in downtown Manhattan with nice outdoor seating head up and east to Gramercy Park’s Mumbles on the southeast corner of 3rd Avenue and 17th Street or the legendary Pete’s Tavern on the northeast corner of Irving Place and 18th St., if you’re willing to wait a bit. You’ll get taste, atmosphere and old-fashioned diner style portions and get charged 30%-40% less for your burger than at  Jack Bistro.

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